Damn it, I’m a freak, 15-year-old Trevor McPherson thought to himself in a simultaneous state of misery and euphoria, wiping beads of sweat off of his forehead while packed tightly in the backseat of the family car occupying the middle spot with humanity on both sides of him. It was only 9:15 a.m. and it was already in the 80s with four hours left on the five-hour drive to the family cabin in Bemidji, Minnesota, where Trevor and his family would be spending the next day and a half. But whenever the discomfort of the situation started to aggravate Trevor, all he needed to do was turn his head in either direction and his mind was instantly cleansed of its tribulations. At this moment, he chose to turn his head slightly to the left, calculatedly hiding his stares behind a pair of sunglasses…
Trevor’s older sister Courtney was sitting close enough to him that he could feel her breathing. Her eyes were closed and she was consumed by the music blasting through her earbuds, subtly bouncing to the beat. Trevor took the opportunity to study his 17-year-old sister from top to bottom. The morning sun was gleaming straight through the passenger side window and illuminating her natural blond hair. Courtney typically went brunette for much of the year, but let the dye wear off and revert to blond for those summer months, and Trevor thought she looked prettier as a blond, an opinion reinforced as he watched the blond hair sparkle with the sunlight, framing her gorgeous facial features perfectly and flowing over her shoulders onto her skimpy pink tanktop. Trevor’s eyes continued to scan down his sister’s body as he silently admired her perky breasts, her flat stomach peek-a-booing out of that tanktop just above the waistline of her jean shorts. Trevor felt a twinge of guilt along with a surprise burst of adrenaline as he noticed how the frayed light blue denim came to an abrupt end just below Courtney’s asscheek before giving way to a pair of long, smooth legs that he knew she had just shaved the night before in preparation for the cabin weekend.
But for everything Trevor had already looked at and adored in that 30-second scan of his big sister, he saved the best for last as his eyes fixated on what Courtney was holding in her left hand only an inch or so above her leg….the same item she was at that moment lifting to her mouth. Trevor felt a thrill pulsate through his body as his sister placed a freshly lit all-white cigarette to her lips and took a drag. Trevor watched as Courtney ingested her typically generous snootful of smoke, and as he often could when riding in the car with her, was able to hear the
smoldering tobacco and paper from her cigarette crackle due to the intensity of her sucking on its filter. Trevor frequently counted the seconds that his sister pulled on her cigarettes and found it to average about six seconds, but he usually managed to feel lost in the moment to the point that it seemed like hours.
Courtney removed the cigarette from her mouth and Trevor continued to enjoy the show, watching a huge ball of creamy smoke disappear into his sister’s mouth and remain inside her body for at least as long as the time in which she dragged on the cigarette. Her already impressive bosom expanded even further after inhaling that smoke but Trevor knew the best was yet to come. Smoke slowly started to trickle out of Courtney’s nose preceding larger volumes of smoke that spilled from her mouth and nose in jets that sailed straight into the headrest of the car’s front seat, with massive volumes of her exhaled smoke dancing around in front of her face and then continuing to hover there for moments to come before slowly getting sucked out the cracked window a foot or so to her left. Trevor was so thankful that Courtney liked to listen to music with her eyes closed, and perhaps more so at that moment than ever before.
He then watched Courtney lower her left hand back to her thigh, where the cigarette rested so closeby. Trevor studied the smoldering all-white cigarette, admiring it the way normal guys his age would admire a tricked-out muscle car or hot rod. The green rings and Marlboro logo on the cigarette intrigued him, serving as a contrast to the whiteness of the rest of the cigarette. But even more than the cigarette itself, Trevor was fascinated by the smoke coming off of it. Given how severe of a drag Courtney had just taken, the cigarette was producing serious streams of smoke. The smoldering end was sending a copious toxic stream mostly straight upward but Trevor was even more intrigued seeing the smoke from the filter end flow right onto his sister’s bare leg which it was only millimeters away from, the creamy smoke becoming at one with Courtney’s creamy legs.
Courtney then raised the cigarette again, but this time only to ash it. Three windows in the car were cracked open, and the driver’s side rear window was one of them. Courtney opened her eyes just as she tapped the cigarette ash to the window. Trevor was watching, but quickly pretended to just be admiring the scenery outdoors as his sister caught him looking. She gave him a quick and uninspired smile before closing her eyes again. It was the kind of smile that Trevor was used to from Courtney, the sort of smile a big sister gives to a kid brother who she doesn’t have a close relationship with either way. They had never fought much growing up, but never really bonded either. Trevor was at peace with the fact that he was effectively invisible to his sister, but that she loved him like the
family that he was. Given the circumstances, he even found some comfort in her disconnect with him, as his feelings towards her were too inappropriate to act upon and he knew he’d never even give it a second thought so long as he was mere elevator music in life’s journey to her.
But as happened all too often on family drives with the family, Trevor’s seemingly laser focus on older sister Courtney was quickly derailed, and all it took was a flicking sound to his right to refocus Trevor’s attention. Trevor was already halfway to the point of exhaustion from the eye candy he’d been treated to thus far on the trip but that eye candy was not about to ebb at this point as he laid eyes on 14- year-old sister Haylee in perhaps the most seductive lolita pose he’d ever seen her in. As close as they were already in the tightly packed back seat, Haylee’s left leg was cutting into Trevor’s space even more as she bent it his direction to paint her toenails. Trevor then sneaked a peek at her face, struck as always at the contrast between Haylee’s beautiful and innocent eighth-grade features and the freshly lit all-white cigarette dangling from her mouth.
Focused on applying the appropriate amount of hot pink polish on her toes, Haylee was as oblivious as her sister was to Trevor’s wandering eyes as she puckered up her lips and made the limping cigarette go erect. The cigarette remained fully upright for about four seconds as Haylee inhaled smoked, allowing Trevor to observe that the pink markings on the cigarette’s filter matched the color of her toenail polish. In seconds, the cigarette returned to its limp position dangling from Haylee’s lips, with wispy releases of smoke from her mouth and nose that lazily scattered about in contrast to the swift G-force exhales he had just seen from Courtney. Trevor continued to admire the stream of smoke rising from the smoldering end of Haylee’s cigarette, some of which was being absorbed by Haylee’s flattering mane of curly light brown hair but most of which was rising straight up into her nose.
Trevor had long ago come to terms with older sister Courtney’s smoking as she had been smoking for almost as far back as he could remember, but there was a whole different set of emotions that he attached to little sister Haylee’s habit, which was now almost three years old and which Trevor had watched metamorphisize from its inception. Having long been fascinating by Courtney’s smoking, Trevor had tried smoking on numerous occasions and found it repulsive, so he had a sexualized respect for the fact that his baby sister was willing and able to copiously consume cigarettes with such a natural style, even to the point of not minding that a stream of smoke rising from her cigarette was flowing straight into her nose and eyes, creating a haze which almost completely camouflaged the residual freckles
on Haylee’s face that had nearly entirely faded away at this point. Two more times in the next 60 seconds, Trevor watched his baby sister take dangling drags while polishing the toenails on her left foot, and the ash on the end of her cigarette was now a good inch long.
Trevor continued to observe as casually as possible out of the corner of his eye as Haylee put her toenail polish away and then finally took the cigarette out of her mouth to approach it to her window. Trevor continued to watch and was able to see the air pressure catch hold of the long ash before it could be deposited out the window and blew straight at him, landing on his jeans. He didn’t figure Haylee even realized that her ashes were all over Trevor, but even if she had, she didn’t say or do anything to recognize the occasion.
Haylee leaned her head back to the seat and made an exasperated sigh, touching her forehead to wipe off the perspiration in the steamy car, then with unsettled discomfort began to shift around the bulky gray sweatshirt she had put on in the relative cool of the early morning when she first put it on. She took a drag from her cigarette then looked to Trevor, finally breaking a silence that had endured for at least 15 minutes inside the car.
“Could you hold this for a second?” Haylee asked rhetorically, handing Trevor her cigarette before he even had a chance to respond. The escalation of Trevor’s sexual energy cranked up another notch as he held his kid sister’s smoldering cigarette in his right hand. Haylee than began to lift the sweatshirt up over her head to take it off. Even though the moment lasted less than 10 seconds, Trevor was able to ride the moment out for all it was worth, watching as Haylee’s bare midriff was exposed inch by inch as the sweatshirt was lifted, her perfectly toned and tanned midsection fully revealed for a snapshot in time before the blue tanktop underneath the sweatshirt fell back into place and covered most of her stomach up again. But the peep show still wasn’t done as Trevor began to admire Haylee’s lower body in a pair of tiny and skin-tight white shorts that had been largely covered up by the sweatshirt. Perfectly centered on Haylee’s crotch was her pack of Camel Pink No. 9’s, but the sweatshirt removal pushed it forward onto the car seat and gave Trevor a brief opening to admire the perfect outline of her vagina in the tight white fabric. Trevor had always been a master of impulse control and was extremely thankful for that in this moment, because for all the times he wanted to reach out and touch one of his sisters’ nether regions, never had he experienced a moment as irresistible as that one looking at Haylee’s crotch.
The peep show was over all too quickly as Haylee’s sweatshirt was completely off and she was now stuffing it in a bag sitting on the floor in front of her. Trevor took advantage of those final moments in which he possessed Haylee’s cigarette to move his fingers down to the end of the filter. The filter was incredibly moist and Trevor’s body tingled as he contemplated that Haylee’s saliva was responsible for the moisture on that cigarette filter. His observation ended all too quickly as Haylee said “thanks” before reclaiming the cigarette from his hand. Trevor watched as the cigarette went back into Haylee’s mouth and she looked him and his clothing over as she took a nice drag. As she removed the cigarette from her mouth and completed her drag, she asked Trevor through a messy talking exhale, “Aren’t you hot? I’m dying here!”
Trevor shrugged and said “Not too bad”, satisfying Haylee’s very limited curiosity and ending the conversation. But Trevor lied as he was almost crawling out of his skin with misery decked out in his long T-shirt and jeans smothered in between his sisters with little room to move. Still, the alternative of dressing for the season was worse in this scenario, as every time he was in the presence of his heavy-smoking sisters for these road trips he knew he would lose control of his male equipment on several occasions, and wanted to make sure he was as covered up as possible for when it happened even if it meant being miserable in seasonally inappropriate clothing.
Haylee, however, was unable to keep her continued discomfort to herself, and finally vocalized it to those in the front seat of the car, loudly asking “Dad, can we get some A/C going soon?”
Trevor knew the moment was coming that the request would be made and for the first time in quite awhile directed his attention to his parents in the front seat. Trevor could tell at a very young age that he was without question his father’s son, and knew before his dad even opened his mouth what the response would be. A terse, laid-back “Sure” was all that came out of dad’s mouth as he took a quick glance in the rearview mirror and surveyed his three children in the backseat, giving a quick glance at Haylee and Courtney that Trevor was all too familiar with from years of doing it himself.
“Thanks daddy”, Haylee responded innocently, and Trevor saw the smirk on the face of his pushover dad hearing those words from his youngest daughter. Trevor had rarely seen his father deviate from that easygoing demeanor with one major exception, and that was when Trevor accompanied his father to a “Take Your Sons To Work Day” event a couple of years earlier. Trevor’s father was the manager of
the IT department at a major medical equipment company in the Minneapolis area and Trevor was taken aback seeing the more aggressive, managerial side of his father that virtually never came out at home. But the emerging voice from the car’s front passenger seat gave Trevor his latest reminder of why his dad was so peaceable at home.
“Courtney!” shouted Trevor’s mom, alerting her oldest daughter who was still bopping to the music coming out of her earbuds. “Put your window up. Your dad is turning on the air conditioning”.
As Courtney responded with an abrupt “okay” and proceeded to close the window cracked open next to her, Trevor’s attention was briefly directed towards his mother in the front seat as she took a drag from a cigarette of her own. Even though his mother had just turned 40 and was “over the hill” in every sense of the word from the perspective of a 15-year-old boy, a flood of memories rolled back into Trevor’s face as he watched the cigarette smoke flow from his mom’s still- beautiful face. Images of a slightly younger version of that face are forever imbedded in Trevor’s memory from his boyhood, and as icky as he often felt lusting for his two sisters today, at least he was no longer lusting for his mother as he did during those elementary years when his mom was the only smoker in the household.
His sisters quickly reclaimed Trevor’s attention, however, as they dug around briefly in their bags and extracted “butt bucket” ashtrays that they would now need for the remainder of the drive in the enclosed car. Trevor knew the ride would only intensify from this point forward as there would no longer be an outlet for the mass volume of smoke being produced by the females in the car, leaving him to marinate in it. Just like with the heat, however, Trevor was more than willing to endure the discomfort of the direct smoke exposure for the gratification it gave him. And even though he had lived his entire life in this environment, Trevor knew his family was outside of the mainstream in its permissiveness about smoking and its indifference about its effects on the family’s nonsmoking members. He found this especially surprising given that his mom was a registered nurse and dealt with the effects of smoking on a regular basis. They were good parents, but between dad’s laid-back permissiveness and mom feeling like a hypocrite for denying her daughters access to the habit she loved so much, the tobacco-friendly environment Trevor was surrounded by was allowed to proliferate.
Trevor’s attention snapped back to older sister Courtney as the retrieval of her butt bucket apparently induced her to forage for more tobacco paraphenelia in her bag.
A fresh pack of Marlboro Light Menthols was extracted from the bag and Courtney wasted no time packing them against her wrist. Having focused so much time on Haylee, Trevor had lost track of how long it had been since Courtney had finished her last cigarette, but he knew it hadn’t been long at all and it didn’t surprise him in the least that Courtney was already about to smoke another one. He kept count of how many cigarettes each of his sisters smoked whenever they made these drives up north and Courtney always beat Haylee decisively. Trevor had seen Courtney’s consumption rate escalate over the past several years and while he didn’t know exactly how much she smoked, it was a rare occasion that he didn’t see her without a cigarette around the house and figured that Courtney probably smoked as much as her mother did. Trevor watched through the corner of his eye as Courtney peeled off the cellophane and opened her fresh pack of cigarettes, popping open the box top, extracting one, inserting it in her mouth and dangling long enough to grab her lighter and bring yet another cigarette to life. Courtney’s eyes closed and she went back to listening to her music.
The windows of the Lexus had been closed for only a minute or so but Trevor could already recognize the growing air pollution inside the vehicle courtesy of three females all smoking at the same time. The smoke that was recently getting sucked out the cracked windows was now all flowing towards the respiratory system of the guy trapped in the middle of it all, and that was Trevor. He breathed in a little bit harder to savor the aromas of three different brands of cigarettes engulfing him simultaneously and found himself enjoying this ride even more than he already had.
But Trevor’s intangible sense that the peaceful, easy feelings of that juncture of the drive were about to come to a screeching halt started to metastasize as Haylee’s boredom got the better of her and she asked a question of her sister.
“So Court where are you going first when we get there?”
Haylee’s inquiry was met by several moments of silence. She took another drag from her two-thirds smoked cigarette and looked at Courtney with a puzzled expression, noticing Courtney was engrossed in her music and probably hadn’t heard her.
“Court,” Haylee offered again, still getting no response and expecting at this point that her sister was just ignoring her. Haylee’s hot temper once again got the better of her as she reached her left hand behind Trevor and whacked Courtney on the back of the head while snorting “I asked you a question, idiot!”
An angry and startled Courtney pulled out her earbuds and sent a stare Haylee’s direction that was so icy that it briefly cooled the entire car long before the air conditioning had a chance to. “Don’t you hit me, you little brat!” Courtney shouted.
“Well then answer me when I ask you a question, bitch!” Haylee shouted back at an even higher decibel level, with “poor Trevor” stuck in the middle of the catfight.
“Girls!” mom shouted turning her head to the backseat with a level of anger even more tangible than either of the daughters had been able to muster. “This is too long of a drive to put up with this shit and you do not want to test me today!” warned a stern mom through a talking dangle that Trevor was all too familiar with from when he was a young boy.
“Tell her to quit hitting me!” Courtney exclaimed.
Mom, knowing that the altercation was Haylee’s doing, focused her attention on Haylee. “Hands off Haylee. How many times do we have to go through this with you? You don’t hit your sister and you don’t use that potty mouth either.”
A defensive Haylee responded. “I was just trying to be nice and ask her about–”
“I don’t care!” Mom interrupted. “If your sister wants to be left alone, then just leave her alone. You can talk to your brother”
Mom turned back around as a clearly pissed off Haylee rolled her eyes, taking another drag from her cigarette and looking back at Courtney with a rage that had intensified given that mom had taken Courtney’s side as always. Haylee again stealthly took her arm behind Trevor and gave Courtney a second hard whack to the back of the head, this time more loudly directing a “Bitch!” comment Courtney’s way at the moment of impact. Trevor knew all hell was about to break loose and he couldn’t have been more right.
Courtney broke into immediate retaliatory mode and swung around to the front of Trevor to take a punch at Haylee’s gut. An all-out melee broke out amongst screams from mom in the passenger seat and even a couple of softer calls for a cease fire from dad, and Trevor was stuck right in the middle with his sisters’ arms and legs flailing and two smoldering cigarettes recklessly flying about as the attack progressed. Only about a split second after Trevor considered the possibility of what was about to happen, the remaining stub of Haylee’s Camel Pink came
raging towards his face. Trevor turned to dodge it but still felt the unforgiving cherry of his baby sister’s cigarette sear the flesh just underneath his chin on the right side of his face, causing him to yelp in pain.
Dad quickly pulled over to the side of the road and mom was screaming at the girls but amazingly even torching Trevor’s face wasn’t enough of a game changer for Courtney and Haylee to immediately refrain from beating each other senseless. Mom’s screams finally reached a decibel level in which the girls got the hint though, and they retreated.
“Are you okay, Trevor?” Mom asked with obvious concern after the girls finally quit fighting.
“I’ll live but it hurts,” Trevor responded in his usual low-key way, touching the burn on his face and quietly treating it like a badge of honor.
“Sorry to hear it hurts baby,” Mom responded. “We’ll take care of it though. The next town is only a mile ahead and we’ll get you bandaged up.” Mom then turned to Haylee with an entirely different tone. “As for you young lady, you’re gonna find out that you’re not too old for your daddy to whoop your ass right out in public. We’re finished putting up with this attitude from you, and this time, somebody got hurt.”
Haylee’s annoyed silence suddenly pivoted to nervous humiliation while Trevor could tell dad was the one most annoyed at this point. While the family was doing well financially, this cabin stretched them a little more thin than they’d prefer, and Trevor knew his dad wanted to spend as much time as possible up there in the summer. Dad even blew off a friend’s repeated request for a nostalgic road trip to Sioux Falls, South Dakota, fibbing about having work commitments so he could squeeze in a full weekend at the cabin. Making a small town pit stop for first aid for one child and to belt the ass of another was not a detour he had any desire to make. But he nonetheless was a good soldier and pulled into the gas station parking lot on the edge of town, where he parked the car and looked back to Haylee, who stepped outside for her comeuppance without a single word spoken.
Meanwhile, mom was rummaging through her purse for Band-Aids and a tube of ointment. Once she found them, she leaned back to hand them to Courtney, telling her to “take care of your brother and consider yourself lucky that you’re not out there getting what your sister is getting.”
Courtney readily obeyed, knowing she was getting off easy for her role in the incident and felt a little sorry for her brother. She placed her half-smoked Marlboro Light Menthol 100 in the corner of her mouth and dangled it as she turned to Trevor, asking through a talking dangle if it still hurt. Trevor responded that it didn’t hurt too bad, and he wasn’t lying in the least as he literally felt no pain at all in that moment watching his older sister’s talking dangle. Courtney squeezed some skin ointment out of the tube and then leaned forward to apply it underneath Trevor’s chin. Her still-dangling cigarette was literally only a couple of inches from his face as she rubbed on the ointment, and however intense his exposure to his sister’s smoking was had been up to that point, this was the most direct assault he had ever been treated to, and the best part of it was that Courtney was completely oblivious to her obnoxious secondhand smoke assault and to the party in his pants she was treating Trevor to.
But the three remaining members of the car all redirected their attention to what was going on outside. Haylee’s dad had been talking to her for a minute or so up to that point but the main event was about to transpire as dad was taking his belt off. Trevor knew Haylee had to have been humiliated as she bent over her father’s knee to take her ass-whooping, but he envied her father as the belt cracked against those tight white shorts covering Haylee’s posterior. Haylee got six lashes of the belt before dad helped her stand up, patting her on the back and offering some words of consolation.
With all the excitement, Trevor and Courtney had briefly forgotten about putting the bandage over Trevor’s wound but Courtney approached him one last time, still dangling her cigarette, and fastening the bandage under his chin. Trevor inhaled one more time while his sister hovered in his face, her smoke flowing straight into his nose in the same way that Haylee’s did earlier while she was polishing her toenails. Courtney backed away, smiled at Trevor and rhetorically asked “Better?” Trevor smiled and nodded approvingly, hoping Courtney didn’t look down to see just how much better Trevor was doing than he was five minutes ago….and more grateful than ever for all the clothing he was wearing.
Meanwhile, a humbled Haylee quietly got back into the car and sat down, a single tear rolling down her cheek, hoping to keep to herself but getting one more demand from mom before she did. “What do you say to your brother, Haylee?”
Haylee looked to Trevor with a genuinely apologetic look bordering on pity that he rarely saw from her before she said “I’m really sorry, Trevor”. She surprised him by moving in to hug him, and as she engulfed him, Trevor was taken aback by two
things….the more-than-expected boob presence he felt press into his chest and the extent to which his baby sister reeked of cigarettes while wrapped up in her arms. Even if he had been mad at Haylee in the first place for the bodily damage she imposed upon him, he was certainly over it now. His rock-hard erection, on the other hand, wasn’t even close to being over. Immediately after pulling back from the hug with Trevor, Haylee picked up her pack of Camel Pink No. 9’s and her lighter. She lit up another cigarette, and as the car took off again, Trevor couldn’t help but appreciate the irony that despite her punishment, the very cigarette habit of Haylee’s that caused his injury was still going to proceed as business as usual for the remainder of the drive. Only in the McPherson family, Trevor thought to himself with a smirk.
The rest of the drive up to the cabin was without incident, and Trevor relaxed in the sealed car bathing in an endless haze of secondhand smoke as his mom and two sisters smoked one cigarette after another after another for 3 1/2 remaining hours. Trevor’s eyes and nose burned and he figured his dad’s had to have been burning as well, but never was heard a discouraging word from either of them. Trevor had been a shy wallflower through his awkward teenage years but had been waiting for a “trigger” moment to break out, and today’s incident with his sisters seemed to have been the motivation he needed to act upon the sexual feelings he had been repressing, particularly as it applied to girls who smoke. He had a crush on a few girls from school, one in particular who he knew was a smoker. Thoughts passed through his head on that long drive that he should chase after her, but it would probably be another two months before he saw her again given that it was summer break. In the meantime, Trevor thought to himself, he just might go out to the swimming area of the lake near their cabin that evening and see if there was anything going on there.